Well, after Friday's workout I'm still sore, more so today than yesterday. I did a little work today though...I tried out a dead lift. 50lbs...kind of pathetic. I'm going to try to get to the gym tomorrow. Okay, nix that. I'm GOING to get to the gym tomorrow and I'm going to workout...how MUCH I'll lift though, is a whole different issue. My legs still feel bruised, even though they aren't. I just hope that this is a good thing and that I'm building muscle. I know it's not feminine, but I want to be freaking strong. AND ripped. AND sexy. I want to have guns. I want to have tight, strong, killer legs.
In other news..American Gladiators is back on. It's pretty sweet and motivating. I've also started watching "The Biggest Loser". It's really amusing AND motivational....for many reasons. First of all, it totally makes me want to keep on track with my eating AND my workout....but more than that it makes me really want to get on track with getting certified as a personal trainer and a dietitian. I want to motivate people to lose the weight. I know it sounds bad, but honestly I have very little sympathy for fat people. I do understand that some of those that are obese are that way through no fault of their own....but they're in the vast minority...unless 2/3 of the nation is porky because of some glandular problem. If THAT is the problem, we have more problems than just being freakin' fat....we're all genetically SOL.
However, methinks that ISN'T the problem...and that's good news. We're fat and it's our fault...again that's good news. Why? Because if it's our fault that we're fat, we can fix it. It's within our control....and for me AS an overweight person that's empowering. It is 100% my fault that I got fat...but because of this, I can fix it...and I AM fixing it. I'm down almost 40 pounds and I did it on my own, albeit with the gracious support of my husband.
I want to be in the minority of Americans. I will achieve my goals...all of them. If *I* can do it, anyone can. I come from a background the revels in inactivity...and revels in "it's just not fair that I'm fat. it's not my fault" (All the while shovelling pork rinds into one's mouth with pudgy hands).
I want to help others because frankly, I'm sick of Americans being seen as fat fucks. It's time for things to change.
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2 comments:
I'm really glad you're so motivated for your journey to become healthier! It's refreshing to hear another overweight person say that we got ourselves into this mess, and we can get ourselves out. Way to go!
I always get sad when I see that you are so negative about how much you're lifting at the gym. Please, please take it easy and slowly! Don't think less of yourself because you can "only" deadlift 50 pounds, or any other amount of weight. You are doing so well by just getting there and lifting - that's something I have not gotten myself to do again yet. If you stay focused on how MUCH you are lifting, you could push too far/hard and end up injured. This is what has always derailed me in the past. I don't want to see it happen to you too!
Keep up the good work!!! :)
Thanks for the comment Kelly.
I know I tend to be hard on myself..but I sometimes worry that if I'm not hard on myself I will backslide, and I cannot allow that to happen. Complacency is what got me to be a chunky-monkey in the first place
I obviously don't want to hurt myself. That would be counterproductive. However, I also don't want to underestimate what I can do either.
It's a very delicate balance and it's good to have another gal to discuss this stuff with.
BTW, get yourself to the gym :)
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